When I want to have the best year ever, I look at this quote. This is one of my favorite quotes because it keeps me focused on what I'm committing to when I procrastinate. Every time I say no to getting up and getting out there, I'm saying yes to missed opportunities; yes to broken promises to myself; yes to feeling overwhelmed later when I feel like I haven't gotten anything done; yes to excuses – the list goes on. When I say yes to those things, I'm also saying no to success; no to opportunity; no to connections; and no to myself.
In a year from now, you bet your ass I will wish I had started today.
Throughout my years coaching clients all over the world, the one constant among them is the dreaded new year's resolution. It's something we all seem to make and more often than not, all seem to bomb. What typically stands in the way of committing to it an following through is a lack of clarity. Sure, you may know what you want to be, do, or have in the new year, but are you also aware of the habits you need to create to make it happen? Do you know what you need to leave behind to move forward successfully?
In this episode, I'll introduce you to 10 questions to help you "complete" this year, and prepare you for the new one. I'll guide you through each step, and you'll come out on the other side with a better idea of what you really can really do to have the best year ever.
Temptation is everywhere, gentlemen. You can be driving to the gym, ready to hit it hard, and find yourself in the Dunkin' Donuts drive thru a moment later... if you give into the temptation. Integrity through distractions, right?
Distractions are even more prevalent. Distractions are temptations disguised as noise. You may not feel that temptation is the right word, but when you see the Facebook notifications on your phone, it's difficult to resist the temptation to pause what you're doing and check them, right?
On a bigger level, having the discipline to stay focused through distractions is what so many men struggle with - especially young men. Guys in their early 20s are developing their goals and aspirations for life, while also discovering what their integrity is all about.
I was recently asked by a younger gentleman about managing the expectations of others while trying to stay responsible, accountable, and keep his integrity. In this episode, we're going to talk about integrity, responsibility, and what you can do to stay focused while surrounded by distractions.
THIS EPISODE HAS CURSE WORDS.
I went to an event yesterday and heard Tony Robbins speak. One of the exercises he had us do was to meditate on a moment we are forever grateful for, and I thought of the time my dad visited me and Jami in Texas, and I taught him how to tie a bow tie.
Coincidentally, we just passed the anniversary of his death, and a young man for whom I am a mentor just lost his father to the same deadly, unexpected heart attack. He is processing, and I am helping any way I can. I thought it was a good time to revisit this story and tell it on an episode so you can hear the impact.
Losing someone close to you is an incredible pain. But losing a parent is worse. I can't even imagine what it must feel like losing a child. This is my story of losing my dad. I hope that it helps you as just rereading it has helped me
For many of us, happiness and contentment are synonymous. We reach a moderate level of success, while secretly wishing we could do (fill-in the blank). Most of the time, that one thing we wish were doing professionally –instead of what we're currently doing– is in a completely unrelated field. It is our fear of switching gears and venturing out into the unknown that keeps us in our safe place –our regular job, regular pay, regular, predictable life.
Until one day, someone enters our social circle and is doing exactly the thing we secretly wish we were doing. This moment, for men all over the world, is a catalyst to creation. In an instant, ego dances with doubt, ideas break bread with creativity, and pride tells us we can do better than this guy, while our saboteur tries to talk us out of it.
This moment is paramount to success and fulfillment for many of us. We need someone to show up and burst our bubble. We need a competitor to challenge us. We need to see that we're actually a rather small fish, and this pond is bigger than we thought.
This doesn't have to be about a career or professional position either. It happens in fitness levels all the time. You were the fittest, most bad-ass of your group of friends... that was until the new guy showed up with muscles a little bigger than yours, and a six pack that makes you look like a fatty.
You have to step up. You can do better. You know it.
In this episode, we're exploring the reasons why you need challengers in your life. Whether it's for personal or professional fulfillment, you need someone (or multiple people) to burst your bubble and make you take action.
In today's modern society of what I like to call Throwaway Ideals, it can be difficult to see yourself finishing anything all the way. Most of us are too easily conditioned to cut and run when the going gets tough because there's opportunity and alternatives abound. We start a lot of projects, chase a lot of ideas, and break ground on new endeavors... but we rush through the motions so quickly that we often miss details, and cause things to derail.
More importantly, when things derail we jump ship and start something new. It's like building a wooden boat. We begin applying the wooden slats to the hull, nailing them into the frame, and increasing our pace. We get excited at the prospect of soon sailing our new boat, that we begin cutting corners, skipping nails, and forgetting small details.
Some of us will quit building about halfway through because a step we missed (skipped) in the beginning, needs to be completed, which means we have to backtrack and start over. No good. The others that get the boat in the water immediately notice the skipped steps when she starts to take on water. The effort to rescue and rebuild can seem too much, so we let her sink and start a new project.
“What’s a gentleman like you doing in a place like this?”
Las Vegas is dubbed as “Sin City,” and with good reason, as it offers just about every kind of earthly delight under the sun. As such, it might seem a contradiction to recommend this place to bona fide gentlemen. Nonetheless, there are actually a lot of activities that gents can try out, without succumbing to a truly hedonistic lifestyle, and burning a hole through their wallet. In this article and episode, we'll explore where to eat, where to stay, what to wear, and where to play.
There is often a misconception when it comes to bringing alcohol to different social gatherings. What’s the best drink to bring to a party? Should bring anything at all? Beer or wine? Both? Food as well? It’s all a lot to keep balanced!
You definitely want to bring a gift to the host of whatever social gathering you’re attending, and this episode will detail what gift AND what else you want to do when you attend!
The world is an interesting place – one full of opportunities and adventures, yet also riddled with terrible decisions, fear, doubt, and distractions that keep us from becoming the best men we can be. Sometimes it takes a hard truth to snap us out of our funk and get us back on track. These hard truths can be difficult to digest, but necessary to keep you from wearing those jeans you cut into shorts. Seriously, throw those things away.
The impetus for a hard truth is never born from malice; rather, it's delivered to guide you back toward your goal of being the best version of yourself. If someone is spouting off hard truths at you and it feels like he's being a dick, he probably is. If, however, he's telling you things you don't want to hear but you're inspired by it, congratulations! You just received a heaping scoop of hard truth.
This episode is a scoop of tough love. Take it and enjoy.
Breaking up is hard to do. At the same time, staying in a relationship that doesn't serve either party is also hard to do. Unfortunately, we are willing to do more of the latter that we are of the former, and that's a disservice to ourselves and each other. Look, it sucks to break up, but it also sucks to be in an unhappy relationship.
A fair amount of my clients (and emails I receive) ask what they should do to exit their unfulfilling relationships. They've read other posts and episodes about listening and building better partnerships with their significant other, but the issues aren't meant to be improved – they're signs the relationship isn't meant to continue any longer.
When you get that gut feeling that, "oh man, this is over –we have to break up," there are a few things you must do in order to keep a level head and move forward. This episode is a double whammy because I'm discussing the signs you know the relationship is over, and what you need to do next to get you through it.
We've all heard, in some form or another, the old adage that "you have to hit rock bottom before you can truly change." In the case of my friend Jan, his rock bottom was a nervous breakdown due to the compounding stress of being an employee, a student, and a man in his 20s trying to figure things out.
It turns out, some men aren't built to be employees, while others aren't built to be entrepreneurs. When you're the latter, you see the risks, the uncertainty, and the stress as too much to handle and you'd rather work and build your future under a company's umbrella. When you're the former, you see all those risks, uncertainty, and stress as a welcome opportunity to build something YOU can control. Being at the mercy of a corporation is too risky for the entrepreneur, while being at the mercy of your own limiting beliefs and fears, is too risky for the employee.
In this episode of The Sharp Gentleman Podcast, I'm joined by my friend Jan Koch, founder and creative mind behind Little Oak, a company of exquisite wooden watches, and we're discussing what it's like building a business after a breakdown. There's an ugly side to being an entrepreneur at heart, and sometimes it rears its head at the least opportune time.
Look, we all want a way to make more while doing less, right? Passive income is the vehicle to allow that, BUT –and this is a big one– they aren't going to make you rich overnight, and they all come with their own shortcomings. In this episode (and article), I'm going to cover the 5 main channels for passive income and what you need to know going in.
I'm also going to share what I've done and what I currently do to make passive revenue each month. It goes without saying (even though I'm saying it now) that some of the links here are affiliate links and I will make a small amount of commission should you choose to use them and purchase something. We're pulling back the curtain, right? Let's do this.
Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments below. [Subscribe Here]
I was recently having a conversation with a group of friends and business connections and mentioned a little bit of my story after my accident, and was met with "what accident?" in response. It turns out, many of my connections don't know my story. The short version is: I was in a terrible car wreck just after high school and it changed my brain. Pretty crazy, right?
In this episode, I will tell the story of the day I was hit by a bus. I'll take you through the events as I remember (and as I was informed of afterward) so you can get a flavor for it. But, because I can't simply tell a story without a lesson, I want to make sure I round out the story with a question on legacy. Look, we all think we carry a certain weight or value with others – they would miss us if we died, right? Well, what would your legacy truly be if you died tomorrow? That's what I want to challenge you to explore after my story. So get ready. Take a listen and don’t forget to subscribe! [Subscribe Here]
Many of us are lucky we never had to/have to transition through a life-altering accident, illness, or injury to emerge with a much greater amount of clarity, conviction, and confidence. In this instance, Suzy went through a pretty wicked stroke and emerged with a new perspective on 'listening to your gut' – and some insights that will help us all avoid making the same mistakes she did.
In this episode, I interview Suzy Wigstadt of Stroke to Success and she reveals her story of suffering a hemiplegic migraine that turned out to be a stroke, and waking up with the mind of newborn. She tells us about her recovery, her perspective, and her realization that it was time to start listening to her gut. Suzy is an amazing woman with an incredible story of overcoming and conquering, and it's an honor to have her on the podcast. Take a listen and don't forget to subscribe!
On a random day a few weeks ago, I was perusing Instagram and stumbled across a brand called Make Today Legendary. They sent me a message about their cause and what their wristband was all about. Skeptical at first, I have to admit I grilled the founder with some follow-up questions.
After discovering more about him and the movement behind MTL, I invited him onto the podcast so we could introduce the mission to all of you.
It's an excellent interview, and I definitely advise you to order some bands of your own after you listen! [Subscribe Here]
As we grow into management and leadership roles, we are often taught how to lead from the wrong people. More often than not, we learn to lead by seeing the world through the lens of the leader immediately above us. This isn't necessarily bad, but it can often have us attached to outcomes, directions, and processes that aren't really our own.
The question I invite you to chew on in that situation is this: Is it really your point of view if you were given the lens from someone else, and it's already pointed where they were looking?
I'm a personal fan of Stoicism, and the avatars of the philosophy: Marcus Aurelius, Epictetus, and Seneca. They demonstrated the tenets of great leadership by practicing control and mindfulness – essentially taking command of the things you can control and ditching everything else.
In this episode, I want to introduce you to the principles of stoicism with a little history, and show you how it can elevate your leadership and legacy. Take a listen and let me know what you think in the comments below.
Dating has progressed from meeting people in public places and having conversation to swiping left or right and texting for hookups. Does it mean all hope for a real relationship is lost? I argue that no, all hope is not lost, but you must be aware of the rules of the game so you don't fall victim to it. This goes for men and women.
In this episode, I'm going to cover the 10 commandments of dating for the Modern Gent. They're not difficult, but they almost certainly end in disaster if not followed. Everything from who to where, to when, and why is listed, so let's get started.
Men are programmed to conquer things. We come with software already installed from the factory that has us compelled to solve things, right wrongs, and stand and fight. It's what makes us such great linear thinkers! We see a problem, we focus on the next steps, we take them, and we conquer. Piece of cake.
Unfortunately, in our male-pattern-thinking, we completely miss the perspectives and emotions of those around us, and how our actions impact them. To call us stubborn and bullheaded is such an easy thing to do when we are in our default mode of "get it done." We don't see the problem with solving the problem... so what's the problem?
Today's episode is about the Hero inside all men and why being a hero makes you an idiot. I'm going to introduce you to your hero, your victim, and your villain so you understand what kind of movie your life really is these days.
The one thing none of us focus on when think think about what we'll be when we grow up, is how we'll look. Maybe that's a good thing. Most Americans simply grow up and get wider, not taller as they age. I'm actually in better shape today than I ever was in high school, but I fell victim to something much more sinister. In honor of keeping things fresh and not-too-grown-up, let's take a minute to talk about something very adult: male pattern baldness.
In this episode, I want to entertain you with the grand story of my journey into and through baldness prevention, care, and acceptance. More importantly, I want to share what it's like to be a 24 year old in a $3000 hairpiece. So have a seat, relax, and let's "comb through this" together. [pun intended]
This episode was recorded with lavalier microphones worn on our lapels at SyncLab Media Studios in Dallas, which was both amazing and left me wishing the sound was a better. To help make sure nothing is missed, I took the time to transcribe everything form out 20 minute interview below.
There's also a video (it is a video studio after all) of the interview with bonus footage and some extras, but it is reserved for the members of The Gentleman's Inner Circle. If you're looking to take your personal development as a man to the next level, I highly recommend you join me today. For a very limited time, membership is significantly discounted. Join today!
In this episode, we'll cover The Gentleman Warrior, and the a few of the nine mantras that go into making your life the best it's ever been.
Have you ever been minding your own business when suddenly a perfume or cologne wafts through the air and completely captures your attention? Maybe it was a scent that reminded you of that old girlfriend you had back in college. Maybe it reminded you of that guy at the office that smells like he bathes himself in cologne before coming to work every morning. Whatever it is, smell is one of the most powerful senses when it comes to triggering old memories and creating new ones.
Make sure you’re making the right impression with your scent, gentlemen.
Here are FIVE tips to help make sure you know the Right Way to Wear Cologne.
Today, I am on location with my good friend Aimee Bentson. You may remember her from the episode where we discussed the Dos and Don'ts of Online Dating. It was a hit episode, and I thought it would be a good idea to get her take on the modern gent these days.
So today, we are going to cover 5 ways you can become a modern gent – more importantly, a version that is authentic to who you already are. We can all look like modern gentlemen, but some of us don't naturally want to wear a suit and tie... It's about being shamelessly authentic in your style, attitude, and confidence.
Let's get on with the show! A quick note about the audio: We picked up some echo from our location, but I tried to clean up as much as possible. Please enjoy!
When becoming a modern gent, there are 5 huge things you can do to improve yourself and take your presence to the next level. They're all simple but effective. Remember, it's not about completely reinventing yourself overnight; rather, it's about making subtle changes and shifts to evolve into the best version of yourself a little each day.
In a world full of phobias, public speaking is up there at the top – right next to that spider at the end of Arachnophobia. And yet, men and women both dream about absolutely dominating the room with the perfect toast. Many secretly dream of raising a glass and speaking off-the-cuff with such prose that the ladies swoon and someone starts a slow-clap.
It may not go quite as dramatically, but there’s actually a good formula for making sure your toast is remembered for the right reasons, and not because you embarrassed yourself or someone else. Here are 7 keys to help you speak in front of a crowd... especially when you are tasked to give the perfect toast.
With New Year's Resolutions in full swing, I know a lot of us, myself included, can often feel like we're not going to make it happen. We're simply not strong enough to keep up with the willpower necessary to make that big change. We feel stuck... even nine days into the new year.
Sometimes it just takes a few quick things to turn it around for me - the same can be true for you. More often than not, you just need a little perspective reminder of where you are, and how much you've <em>actually</em> done. More importantly, it is an opportunity to be authentic, and notice all the roles you play, the things you do, and who you are in your life.
Gentlemen, this is paramount for you because you often take on more than your fair share (you're the hero, right) and you discount your actions.
Whenever you feel like all your efforts are not making enough change happen, or not happen fast enough, take a few moments to pause. That pause will help you get it together before you decide to throw in the towel. In today's episode, I'll walk you through five secrets to restoring your momentum when you're stuck. Hopefully they help you get back in gear and back on track. It's never too late to get focused and few things are actually lost causes.